Love "yourself" your way

Women become more beautiful as the age grows - like a fine wine. I have always been admirer of my mom,grand-mom,teachers than the young looking girls. Women mature & carry themselves elegantly as they get older.When I turned 30 recently, I was comparing myself with what I was few years back.

That girl in twenties - somewhere between immaturity & maturity - somewhere between I can decide Vs I don't know - somewhere between Its fine to What the heck!!!...

"Between" phase has come to an end. But I had gone through a lot in that between phase...be my marriage, decided to quit job in India and travelling abroad, that adamant "I have to work" attitude, mom of 2 kids... sometimes I think of "what if" hypothetical questions. Then talk to my friends and hear the other side of regrets..Grass is always greener on the other side of the fence - A happy realization that we have to make frequently.

Challenge in front of current generation women is confused choice. Even though the independence to choose what we want is given, the  state of choice remains confused. Women of previous generation had no choice to choose from...their life had been limited to marriage, kids, family. Women of next generation has lots of choices and independence to choose with no confusion. But women in between who is undergoing the transformation, faces the challenge. She is representing both women of previous generation and next generation. She still owns the responsibilities of previous generation while she fights for next generation. Its an unknown factor which tells her that she has to be "this" to prove herself as a woman, mom, wife and a social being. But that factor takes her far away from being an individual.

I am a working woman but can I function like a working man?
I am a modern woman but do I get the complete independence?-
I follow traditions but do I have choice to quit when I feel its not needed?

A woman who wakes up late because she worked late is an irresponsible mother. A woman who has workload & stays late at office is called irresponsible. A woman who chooses for herself "sometimes" over the family is stamped as irresponsible. On the other side, a woman who chooses to be home maker is also stamped as irresponsible.

How do I overcome this challenge? How do I handle that unknown factor? - Give a damn shit about it.I am not here to rehabilitate the sick minded. I am not here to live someone else's life.

In the transformation from 20s to 30s - I transformed into a woman who is different from the girl I know. No more dress up for your man but dress for yourself. No more I do care every simple thing but should I react??...No more I want to express everything but I know what I have to do....

---> Conscious decisions, Exploring options, Living myself.

Every woman should choose what she wants to be every moment. If you are in a situation to justify yourself to someone, you are in wrong hands...Time to break the hand cuff.

My mom who told me to walk with head held high, tells me to keep quiet. It is a laugh loud situation. We realize what we grew up with had become little different. But sometimes it is not about winning or losing. Its about handling the situation. I don't mind to fail in front of my husband. I win by losing. But do I do that to everyone & every situation - No. I make my conscious decisions.

What do I need besides going to work, cleaning the house, bathing kids and cooking meals? Every woman needs something beyond what she is!! Think about it. Walk towards things that is for you. Explore options around you.

End of day when I look at the mirror, it should reflect the woman I dream to be. If it shows a different person, then I have to cure it. Living myself is what makes me!!

This is not about getting rid of the responsibilities but about give a thought on yourself too. It is not about being rude to others it is about being kind to yourself too. It is not about living selfish but about live selflessly selfish. Always change from inside out. Trust me this never breaks what you give...It only adds thing you share for yourself too.

Woman makes the family complete. She spreads love & care. Its time to care for the "she" in you. Give her the importance & focus. Don't search for your hero - Be one!!